Don’t forget a good lubricant.
What is a masturbator
The masturbator is a sex toy for men. The first model looked like a flashlight with a lid, inside which was an imitation of a vagina, mouth or anus. Then there were eggs, rings, cylinders that do not resemble body parts, as well as models with vibration and suction.
Although it is believed that the best is the enemy of the good, this does not apply to masturbation. The hand, of course, is always with you, but the sensations from it are not like friction with a partner. Therefore, a masturbator is a great option for diversifying solo and couple sex.
How to use a masturbator
There is nothing complicated about this: add a little lubricant and start friction. The lubricant must be water-based so as not to damage the surface of the masturbator. Just in case, when buying, ask the consultant which one is better to take for the selected model.
After use, wash the masturbator with a special tool for sex toys. They are also sold in sex shops and marketplaces.
Can a masturbator hurt?
Yes. Although you can masturbate at least every day , sometimes you can hurt yourself. If you forget about lubrication and make intense frictions, there is a chance of mechanically rubbing the sensitive skin on the penis.
If you overdo it, the skin will become :
In addition, an infection may join.
If you notice these signs, you should immediately stop masturbating and not have sex until the skin is completely healed. To relieve symptoms, you can apply, for example, a healing gel with aloe.
What to do if you do not want sex: 7 tips to help
This happens to everyone. Sometimes this is easy to fix with rest or talking with a partner, while other times a doctor is needed.
As scientists have found , it is difficult for the body to focus on sex if basic needs are not satisfied.
It is unlikely that everyone will book a ticket to the Maldives after this message, but you can at least try to get some sleep . Quality sleep improves physical well-being and psychological well-being, so libido should increase. So what is needed :
- maintain a more or less constant sleep schedule;
- create a comfortable environment – the bedroom should be dark, quiet and cool (it is better to ventilate the room before going to bed);
- add physical activity, such as walking more or signing up for a gym;
- do not go to bed immediately after eating or hungry.
Ask yourself if this is a real problem
There is no “normal” or “abnormal” libido, because everyone’s sex drive is different. If this is once every six months and you feel so comfortable, then this is normal. Even the complete absence of sex, if it does not bother you, is also the norm.
Some medications affect the balance of arousal chemicals. Therefore, sometimes the libido shrinks when taken:
- drugs for high blood pressure;
- agents for lowering testosterone and treating prostate tumors;
- hormonal contraceptives.
If you think your medication has affected your sex life, contact the doctor who prescribed it. Sometimes it is enough to conjure with the dosage or time of admission, and the colors will return to life. In other cases, they try to find an analogue.
You can’t arbitrarily quit medicines: a hypertensive crisis or an exacerbation of depression will still not bring passion to your couple.
Deal with personal problems
Internal unresolved problems depress desire. For example, if you are worried about the circumstances at work, do not feel sexy, or do not want to get out of bed at all (and even live). It is clear that until you put things in order in your head, you will not have time for sex.
Sometimes it is enough to wait for the end of a difficult period, for example, the delivery of an important report at work. In more severe cases, you will need the services of a psychologist or psychiatrist.
Talk to a partner
Sometimes problems with sex are a manifestation of tension in a relationship. It seems that you do not quarrel, but things are not going well in bed. Or the problem is in sex. For example, you do not like what your partner does and how.
Whatever it was, we need to discuss the situation with each other. Ups and downs are a normal part of any relationship. If you are interested in them, try to correct the situation. Discuss with the couple or with a family counselor the accumulated problems, tell about what is bothering you. And try to bring back passion, for example, with the help of new positions, sex toys, role-playing games and other ways.
Talking about sex is hard. But without this it is impossible. A partner who treats you as an individual and respects your desires will accept them.
True, we must remember: sex may not return. Especially if the problem is in a different norm for each of you. No persuasion and “perfect courtship” will make a person want more than he needs.
Take care of your health
The reasons for the decrease in desire were one of the most popular questions in the sex education blog of Tatiana Nikonova. And sometimes the question was formulated like this: “How to relieve stress from a partner in order to increase his desire?” In response, Tatyana told her story.
All last year, I basically didn’t want sex, and then it turned out that I had a vitamin D deficiency. The endocrinologist, for other indications, prescribed horse doses to increase to a normal level, and now I really want to. Question: how would the removal of unnecessary worries revive my desire for sex? No way. How could I have guessed that I have a vitamin deficiency if the doctor had not sent me for analysis? Also no way. How would I feel if my partner said that he was humiliated by my refusals? Under pressure because of the responsibility for what I have no idea about and which I have no control over.
Overall health really does have a huge impact on your sex life. Sometimes the physical manifestations of the disease are to blame, sometimes the emotional stress, sometimes the side effects of the treatment. Most often, difficulties arise due to:
- heart disease;
- insufficiency of thyroid function;
- malignant tumors;
- consequences of major operations;
- anxiety disorder.
For example, an increase in blood sugar levels can turn off a gene that carries sex hormones to tissues and organs, and therefore reduce attraction.
Therefore, if you have not had a desire for several weeks , but you are not taking the medicines from the list above, you do not have relationship problems and stress, then it is best not to delay going to the doctor. And remember: depression and anxiety disorder are the same diseases as gastritis, diabetes or tonsillitis. Because of them, you can’t take and stop being sad in the same way as you can’t order the bones to grow together after a fracture.
This does not apply to situations where you are disgusted and scared even from the mere thought of sex. Rather, we are talking about those cases when it seems to be not particularly desirable, but the idea itself does not turn away. Then you can try: suddenly you will be able to catch a wave and have fun.
A partner can help you achieve the right mood. For example, dance, get a massage, or add oral sex to the foreplay.